OTIS AND THE BIKE RIDE

Sweet Release!

Saturday, July 28, 2007 - Day 37

Distance traveled - miles

Last night I planned on getting an early start today, beat the winds, and make the short trip today before 1 or 2pm. When I first woke up today, however, I knew it wasn't going to be an early day. I needed some time, time to sleep a little longer, and just some slow me time to get ready. So I did take my time. I ate my grits slowly. I packed up slowly. After packing a little bit, I realized that I wasn't very relaxed. I was not necessarily anxious, but I wasn't settled, where I needed to be, which was a bit surprising after yesterday's relaxation. I think I had some bad dreams that stirred up some stuff. So I laid down on the bench seat with my head resting on my packed up sleeping bag. I stared up into the trees, at the sun streaming through the canopy. I thought about how peaceful it was there, even with quite a few RVs around. People were surprisingly quite at this campground. A welcome change from the norm. Then I closed my eyes and did some breathing. I took a breath in through my nose, filling my lungs as much as possible, taking in even more air than my lungs could hold, until my throat was full of air. Then I breathed out slowly, through my mouth, exhaling until every bit of air was purged from my body, until I would pass out if I tried to exhale any longer. I did this a few times, concentrating only on my breath. It changed everything. After a minute or two after my breathing, laying and looking up at the canopy of trees again, I got up and continued getting ready. I gathered my dishes to wash and my biking shorts to change into and went to the bathroom. On my way there, I had a sudden realization, an impulse. Suddenly something that has been a big problem in my life for some years became very clear, not an instant solution to the problem, but a clear way to express to someone how to begin dealing with the issue. I thought about it the entire time I was washing dishes, brushing my teeth, and taking a shit. As soon as I was done, I went back to my picnic table, pulled out my journal, and began writing. I wrote a six page letter that absolutely had to be written. I don't know yet if I will send the letter, but it will hopefully allow me to open up a dialogue about the issue. In the middle of writing the letter I had a really good cry. It wasn't a long one, but it came from deep, deep down. A lot was released in that short period of time. Then I resumed writing and finished the letter. I left camp at quarter to one, but I left relaxed, with a huge weight lifted off of me. It allowed me to enjoy the beautiful weather completely.

Surprisingly, today everyone has been quite friendly. I stopped in a little town, Yachats, not far from camp and had some food and a beer just outside a grocery store. Some people asked me about my trip and others just made friendly comments. Amazing. Things have really turned around for me. A little release and a day off was all I needed. I found myself enjoying the day so much more, and I was amazed at just how many people approached me and talked to me today. It was enough people to make up for the last week of no contact.

At camp tonight there are some other people but they are not really the kind of people I want to be around. I talked to two of them, and they are friendly, but they are on a much different life path than myself. The guy is a hitchhiker. Doesn't seem like he's had a steady job at any time in his life. He's older, heading down to L.A., I think. He's from all over, doesn't really claim any one place as home. He seems to have developed a permanent sadness but there is an acceptance in his manner. He has come to terms with his lot in life. He makes no complaints but just humbly goes about his way. I know that he is a man of Jesus. He told me about a church down the road that he thinks has good services in the morning. He said, "If you're a believer, there's a good little church just down the road, across the street." I just allowed it to go past without making any comments on the matter. No use in getting in any kind of discussion about religion on this journey. That's not what it's about. He didn't bring it up anymore, which was good. There was a woman with him. I have no idea what their relationship is. They were talking to each other and eating together when I came in. She lives somewhere near the California border, inland a bit. She also had a sadness about her, but I think she was also not a wanting person. I don't know if they had just met at the campground or if she was helping him in his traveling or what. She has a bike and backpacking tent. He has very little other than a backpack and a bigger tent.

before writing the letter

such a nice little spot

a taste of home

someone owns this

goodnight, moon

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